


I Know Things Now

by Missy



Category: Laverne & Shirley (TV)
Genre: Banter, Explicit Language, F/M, Flirting, Friendship, Happy Days-Era Characterization, Humor, Making Out, implied prostitution, setting a date
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-03
Updated: 2021-01-03
Packaged: 2021-03-12 20:48:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,093
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28516662
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Missy/pseuds/Missy
Summary: Romance is still complicated for the girls - no matter how innocent (or not) they both are.
Relationships: Laverne DeFazio/Lenny Kosnowski, Past Carmine Ragusa/Shirley Feeney, Shirley Feeney/Norman Hughes
Kudos: 3





	I Know Things Now

**Author's Note:**

> A sequel to my fic Hitching - https://archiveofourown.org/works/28279458
> 
> It's worth noting that Lenny is a bit of an amalgam of his season 1 characterization, with a little bit of stuff from this educational short:
> 
> https://youtu.be/X1RjLETVf7Y?t=349

“Hey! Pussaaay!” 

Laverne’s fist collided with the middle of Lenny Kosnowski’s chest and he let out a grunt as she cornered him by her father’s jukebox. “Couldya not yell that in my father’s restaurant?” 

He laughed and wrapped his arm around her waist. “Your Pop’s fighting with his cheese guy in the kitchen, y’know he can’t hear nothing when he’s mad.” He grinned at her, looked her up and down. “So you busy on Saturday?”

She stuck out her chin. “Me and Shirl’ve got a party to go to after work. A couple of Tad Shotz’ friends.”

“Oh? Going out with someone better’n me?” Lenny asked, a shrill, insecure whine entering his tone.

She rolled her eyes. “No, just richer!”

Lenny bounced on his heels. “I toldja to gimmie a couple of years!” he said. “Jake’s gonna open a garage, and he said he’ll make me head mechanic. If that don’t work, I’ll take the dispatcher’s test. After that, I’ll get you a ring and pin you down.”

Laverne rolled her eyes. “Len, Jake won’t even let you ride a bike.”

“You don’t gotta ride ‘em to fix them!” he said.

“And me? Pinned down? Try it,” she growled, grabbing him by the collar of his denim vest.

“Stay still and gimmie a chance,” he growled.

“Oh, get off it, Laverne! She ain’t busy,” Shirley yelled, getting beer from the countertop and sitting down at their usual table. Her feet were barking from a long shift on the line, and the ‘dates’ they’d scared up to cover the last ten bucks of their rent money had been a bust, which meant waitressing at Laverne’s father’s place. As a capper to her day, when she looked up they were making out.

Shirley rolled her eyes as she watched Laverne and Lenny kissing, she pinning him back against the jukebox and his hands clutching her shoulders. They had been like this since high school - had been each other’s firsts for everything - and though they tried seeing other people, they were drawn together like a couple of filthy-minded magnets. It wasn’t that Shirley hadn’t tried to introduce Laverne to rich men with class, but Laverne always returned to Lenny, and part of Shirley had already resigned herself to baking a wedding cake with a Polish flag design. Mr. DeFazio wouldn’t like it, but then again pleasing her father had always only been a moderately important thing for Laverne.

Then Squiggy emerged from the men’s room, and he eyeballed the scene before him and laughed. “Way to go Len!” he brayed.

“Wouldya shut up?” Lenny asked, breaking his kiss with Laverne. “You want her Pop to know we’re making out?”

“So what? Half the neighborhood knows you’re bumping uglies. Whatt’re you, chicken?” asked Squiggy.

“Take that back!” Lenny demanded, cracking his knuckles.

Laverne got right between them. “Boys, don’t fight in my Pop’s place.”

“Or?” Squiggy asked.

She reached up – and down – and twisted their earlobes. “Or I’ll break both your arms so you CAN’T fight!” she snapped. The guys immediately separated, grumbling, when she let go.

Lenny leaned toward Laverne, kissing her on the cheek with a surprising sense of shyness. “I’ll pick you up at seven Saturday,” he said. Envy filled Shirley – until she remembered Norman. Laverne gave Lenny a crooked grin, and patted her cheek as she watched the boys leave.

Laverne got her own beer, and smiled at her ranting father while ordering them a free pepperoni and cheese. She got back to Shirley and let out her own sigh, still rubbing at her cheek.

“So I shouldn’t wait up for you on Saturday?” Shirley asked.

Laverne snorted. “Depends on if we can get Squig out of the apartment. Or if I leave early ‘Cause Len starts making noises with his skin.”

“Oh, pshaw, Laverne.”

“What?”

“Why do you always act like being with that man is such a chore? We both know you’re gonna marry Lenny,” Shirley observed, sipping her beer.

Laverne stuck out her jaw. “So what if I do? Lenny’s nice, and he’s kind of sweet – he treats me like gold, and he looks good, and he thinks I’m pretty. And he said he’d buckle down and get a better job at Shotz to help support us. And Fonzie’d get him a job at Bronkos if I asked. He owes me, after last week.”

“True, you could do worse than Lenny. You HAVE done worse than Lenny,” Shirley said.

Laverne sneered. “And you’ve done better?”

“I did, once.” Memories of Carmine flashed through her mind. Her highschool boyfriend, the one she’d planned to marry, the one who was going to take her to New York and away from the poverty of their upbringing in Milwaukee. A speeding car during his last Golden Gloves tournament had denied them both that pleasure. No wonder she’d gone a little mercenary, a little wild, in his absence.

Even Laverne – she of the sewer mouth and sewer boyfriend – knew when she’d gone too far and patted the back of Shirley’s hand. “Sorry, Shirl.”

“It’s all right. It’s been years,” she said. “Anyway, things are looking up. I saw a cute fella on my walk back home…”

“Thanks for that reminder. What did you do with the car?” Laverne grumbled.

“Never mind – Fonzie said he’d get it back to us by Sunday. Anyway, he’s this handsome, sweet gentleman, and his name is Norman Hughes, and he happens to be a beat cop…”

“A cop!” Laverne gaped at her. “Shirl! You know how dangerous seeing a cop is to our uh…sideline.”

“Yeah, well, we should be quitting that anyway. One day we’re gonna get caught, and where will that leave us?”

“Twenty bucks in the hole for rent!” Laverne growled. “You gotta stop seeing him!”

“I will do no such thing!” Shirley snapped. Laverne clenched her fist, and Shirley did the same.

“NO FIGHTING IN THE PIZZA BOWL!” Frank promptly dumped their pie and paper plates onto the table. “Laverne! You’re going to church with me Sunday!”

Laverne flushed, fixed her sweater, and stared down at the pie. “Yeah, Pop!”

“And I need somebody to pick up the slack Friday night. You gonna come in?”

“Can I keep my tips?”

“Is the Pope Catholic?” 

Laverne grinned. “Thanks, Poppy.” He bustled back into the kitchen, and Laverne let out a low sigh as her father disappeared. “That’ll cover the rent. But next month…”

“We’ll think about next month then,” Shirley said. “Let’s just be happy now.”

It was easier said than done, but Shirley wanted to try.


End file.
